Tom and Jerry in any language

M.'s latest thing is Tom & Jerry, and I'm not surprised at all that she'd go for the violence of it. Today I handed over my netbook to her (the thing is too damn small to use anyway) for her get her Tom & Jerry fix on YouTube, so that I wouldn't have to give up my laptop to her, or hear the wining if I continued my refusal to surrender my laptop.

So now since this has happened once, I'm very sure my netbook will now become the official Tom & Jerry portal.  Today I tried to explain that maybe we should choose a different clip since the one M. chose had Russian writing all over it. I told her, "That one's not in English." Of course she was confused, "What does English means?" Then I realized it doesn't really to matter that some of the Tom & Jerry clips on YouTube are in Russian and various languages, since the show isn't exactly driven by dialogue. So M. can love Tom and Jerry in every language that she wants.

Hope and dreams

Filling out the kindergarten transition summary form. One question is "Please describe your hopes and dreams for your child as s/he begins kindergarten."

When M.'s teacher gave this to me to fill out, I read that question out loud, but only read the part about my hopes and dreams, and said the first thing that came to my mind:

"That she'll move out and live on her own."

The teacher looked at me strange, so I read the question again.

"OH, you mean hopes and dreams FOR KINDERGARTEN."

So I told her I'd have to take the form home to finish and bring back later, because I couldn't think of anything when put on the spot like that, and obviously what I was going to say about M. moving out and living on her own is silly because kindergarten is wayyyy too early for any kid to move out and get her own place.... (right?)

Time to go?

5:19am M. heads out of her room wearing her new hand-me-down backpack and carrying her new hand-me-down lunch bag, ready for the picnic. Unfortunately, it was 5:19am and we wouldn't be going to the park for hours, and hours. But that didn't stop her from asking me every 2 minutes if it was time to go.

Leave no trace

Spring cleaning and reorganization projects are hard enough without having to consider the repercussions of an item accidentally left "out of place."

"HEEEeeeeyyyy! MOOMMMmmmmmy! Why did you put that there? That doesn't go there! You're silly! Did you put that there when I was at school? OOHHhhhhh! That is so silly! MOOMMMmmmy!......" and on and on.

And the item in the spotlight is usually just a piece of paper, a stray plastic bag, a dust rag, any mundane object left in a surprising place--like if I get distracted by the phone and forget to put something away while I'm cleaning. An exclamation will be shouted and the above interrogation will follow. 

There's been a lot of cleaning and reorganizing around here now that my friend, the one with all the twins, is coming to visit and stay with us next week. With all their allergies and our collective behavioral problems, this should be interesting.

Muddling through

Some of us are parenting and others of us are merely "muddling through," as my mom put it to a cousin of mine today, while looking in my direction.

Thanks! I enjoyed that comment almost as much as the one about how if it weren't for the last 5 years with M. I'd still look young.

Tears of joy

Kindergarten registration yesterday. Lady at the school who filed my paperwork asked if this is my first child going to kindergarten. When I said yes, she shared how she cried and cried the first time sending one of her kids to kindergarten. I nodded at her, vaguely. And she seemed concerned that I understand this is a full day kindergarten program, and if I'm sure that's going to be okay. I just nodded and said, "mmm hmmm, yes, I know."

But what she didn't know and what I didn't say is how long I've been waiting for full day kindergarten. It's been like a beacon of light in the distance FOR YEARS, my reason for getting up each day, the source of my night time fears of district budget cuts that could take it all away from me--oh, the horror!

So what I really wanted to say was, "Oh hell YES, I'll be cryin'! But them will be tears of JOY, lady--tears of JOY!!!"

Because I am not a super hero

We took over the way back room of the pizza place today with our friends, the M&Ms.

The Littlest M. grabbed his DS back from my M. after he decided she'd had it long enough. A screaming freak out ensued. Littlest M. retreated to the farthest away empty booth, clutching the DS and regarding the rest of us with a challenging stare.

"You know who you are making really happy right now?" Mommy M asked him, scolding, but in my opinion not firm enough for what he just did.

"Who does she mean? Satan? Does she mean he's making Satan really happy?" I whispered to their Grandma who was next to me watching the showdown. She shrugged, didn't know. The Biggest M., intent on his own DS game, gave me a similar response.

"You need to make a better choice and be nicer." Mommy M. informed Littlest M.

"I am trying!" He shrieked, with bug eyes and dramatic flailing.

"You need to try harder." Mommy M. persisted.

"But I can't!" Littlest M. wailed.

"Why not?" Mommy M. asked.

"Because...I am not a super hero!" He yelled.

And there you have the logic of a 3 year old.

The last one

During another attempt to explain to M. why her latest irrational, delusional, crazy, nutcase, obsessive anxiety (that's been annoying everyone for months) over any situation where she perceives herself as being "the last one" is just plain silly, and while I was telling her it's okay to be the last one, and presenting her with a hypothetical situation of someone saying that whichever kid is the last one in line gets all the cookies (to which she insisted she still would NOT want to be "the last one"), I realized something that made me give up my efforts. Why give up? Well, because after all the convincing and role playing and maybe even hypnosis it will take to undo this particular fixation, there will surely come a day when some unsuspecting, well-intentioned, playful soul will stage a race among the children and yell: 

"Last one is a rotten egg!"

Ponies and Unicorns dreams

M.: "Mommy, what your dreams is?"
me: "Um, I don't remember."
M.: "Are your dreams is ponies and unicorns too?"

The sad part is that I'm sure long ago I used to dream about ponies and unicorns, but I don't even remember anymore.